For the last month, here in this column, I have been carrying out a joke that has probably gone too far. When I first claimed I might "luv" the Jonas Brothers it was with what I believe to be a natural, although perhaps slightly perverted, interest into youth culture and this new boy band phenomenon that enters into countless households daily through television, radio, magazines, and of course the Internet. They are one of the World's biggest bands because they have commandeered a group of kids from eight to 18, catching fans by the throng with poolside pop hooks, good looks and natural charisma. Under the direction of Disney the JoBros have become one of this century's most successful money making schemes and are, frankly, hot as hell. Right? Yeah, well, sort of.
At once amazing and disgusting in their wholesomeness, the Jonas Brothers with their purity rings and superstar smiles and girl craziness, their life is a dream enough to make anyone -- young or old -- at least somewhat jealous. Because they are more successful than you, better looking than you, and ultimately happier than you are. These lucky little devils are leading a life you will only dream of. But they are also a poison to our youth, right? Feeding kids a dream of success based on vanity and virginity while picking their parents pocketbooks. In Rolling Stone, Jenny Eliscu called it the "Clean Teen Machine" and that's exactly what it is. The Jonas Brothers are the perfect con. Golden boys, virtuous rock stars, at once a bastardization of "rock and roll" and the ultimate embodiment of it. That just depends on who's feeding you the definition.
The Jonas Brothers are 'N Sync, The Spice Girls and The Mickey Mouse Club , but they are also Elvis, The Beatles and The Ramones. Aside from the songs, what's the difference between seeing the Jonas Brothers in concert today and the Rolling Stones? Their tactics are shameless but their reach is vast and impressive. And so what can one do but love them with an advanced level of irony and acceptance like well played joke? It may be poisoning our culture with corporate-fed goody-two-shoery but who's really getting hurt? Just LOOK the kids love it!
So do I luv or h8 the Jonas Brothers? I guess it's a bit of both, with one feeding the other. But as for this joke that has gone too far? Well, it's on me most of all, thinking I could write intellectually about the JoBros for a month straight. It's not that this would be an impossible feat, it's just that it is out of the nature of the Jonas Brothers. They are not meant to be analyzed too heavily. That leads to repulsion. But in simple submission they are beautiful beyond belief. And therein lies the glory of the Jonas Brothers: They are the band you love to hate or hate to love, but for that are great whichever way you lean.
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